Now we got desperate a few months ago and uh, because we thought nobody liked us. And uh, we're also pissed off at the fact that people won't play our records on the radio, and we didn't know whether or not it was 'cause our music was crappy or because somebody really knew what the words to the songs meant. So they couldn't . . . So they wouldn't take a chance. So we came to the conclusion that actually all it was was a conspiracy against the Mothers Of Invention because we're supposedly so dirty, vile and crazy and also a threat to our great nation and all that it has stood for in the past and we hope it will not continue to stand for in the future . . . However boys and girls . . . The people who run the radio stations are on the watch, you know, for our records, when they come in as soon as somebody sends a single to the radio station with our name on it they either melt it, break it, stomp on it or send it in an envelope directly back to the record company from which it came with a threatening note. But we said, "What the heck? Why can't we be just like other teen-age rock & roll bands--outside of the fact that we're all over thirty--and go and cut a single record and try and get the sucker on the radio?" So what we did was we went into a professional recording studio in New York City in the middle of the night for two nights in a row and also a Saturday afternoon for mixing and cranked out two miserable teen-age type records with words that couldn't possibly offend anybody and uh they're reasonably singable--by any group other than the Mothers Of Invention-- and uh, they're teen-age boy-girl type songs. And so they're being released this week. I would expect to be able to add these to our list of smash flops very shortly.
"The Central Scrutinizer" actually started out as a new version of "My Guitar Wants to Kill Your Mama". You can sing the words to "My Guitar" right over "Central" and the chord changes will happen in just the right spots.
1968: Essentially performed as on "The Ark", complete with guitar solo. This tune popped up frequently throughout the year, usually performed as mentioned above, but one time (Miami, 3/??) possibly as an instrumental. There are no vocals on the tape during this show opening performance, but that could be due to poor tape quality or early-show mic problems. Nevertheless, this performance follows that same format as the vocal-versions, with a FZ guitar solo climaxing the affair.
1976-77: Another of those "what is this?" versions. This is the SLOW version of this tune. It starts off heavy on the guitar, with Frank playing some distorted chords in a very sluggish yet forceful manner. It is not until the lyrics begin that we realize what song we are in, and then we have second doubts because the lyrics are being sung so slow. When the solo comes, we run and check our tape deck and make sure it is not broken, swearing that this solo should be much faster. But no, the vocals continue, and the voices sound all right, but damn, are they slow. An interesting version, which is actually quite enjoyable once you get over the speed at which it is played. The '77 band slows it down and it works, the '84 band speeds it up and it works- this just must be one solid song.
1984: Essentially played as on YCDTOSA Volume IV, with the standard deviation coming in Frank's solo. Not a bad version of this tune, eh, even though it is the '84 band.
1988: Essentially performed as on YCDTOSA Volume IV, allowing for obvious differences in instrumentation, and with the standard deviation coming in Frank's solo.
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